So one of my friends suggested I write a blog post about laundry…
See, I didn’t know this until a short while back, but apparently most colleges have coin operated laundry facilities. Fortunately my college doesn’t have such nonsense. However, while I get to keep my pocket change to waste on the copious amount of snack machines present on my campus, I’ve been forced to contend with a slew of other issues brought on by having to do laundry at Berea College.
I believe it all boils down to the fact that people here don’t really know how to do laundry and must constantly subject other peoples laundry to their own pathetic laundry habits, the end result leaves much to be desired on my end.
First off, if all the dryers are full and you need to dry your own laundry, you can wait. This is no excuse for you to throw my wet laundry on the nasty concrete floor of the laundry room just because you feel your clothes are more important than mine. I passed you on my way out, we both know that the 30 seconds between our last encounter wasn’t enough time for my clothes to dry, so don’t try to pull this crap with me. I know, I know! It’ll take in the upwards of 30 whole minutes for one of those dryers to be free! Your pseudo-frat boy lifestyle is fast paced and high stakes, what with
Call of Duty: Black Ops having been released just last week, but trust me, you’ll survive.
Second, while in many aspects of your personal life you will find that taking similar items stored multiple locations and consolidating them into one location is a great idea, this is not to be done with the public dryers, especially when it’s being done with two completely different people’s laundry! There is nothing more nightmarish than trying to differentiate your own underwear from the underwear of a complete stranger. The sheer weight of being uncertain as to whose underwear you’re wearing is enough to drive a man to blog about proper public laundry facility etiquette…
Third, some things just can’t be cleaned. I get it, your great aunt who died ten years ago gave you those floral print bed sheets on her death bed, I’m sure they mean a lot to you, but when they wreak of mold after thorough cleaning and stink up the entirety of the laundry facilities it’s time to let go and move on. After all, are moldy, threadbare bed sheets really how you want to honor the memory of your dead great Aunt? Furthermore, I know our labor positions here at the college pay us very little and not very often, but seriously, don't shy away from buying some new crap when you need it.
Finally, have you seen this Batman shirt?
My girlfriend got me this shirt for our first Christmas together and it mysteriously went missing after doing my laundry a few weeks back. It should be basic commonsense not to take other peoples crap since most of you people are at least approaching your twenties and all, but I digress, my girlfriend and I no longer own matching Batman shirts.
